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You should be proud of your children when they show great achievements, such as winning a competition. What happen when you have average children that never win any competition and don't show any superiority? It might be more embarrassing when you homeschool average children.
- When it comes to the competition, we never expect that our children will be the winner. We will stay in a satisfaction that they can join or participate in the competition without any hope to win the game.
- I just feel inferior to talk with other moms about children's achievement. I get so sick listening to proud moms of their children's achievements.
There are many perceptions or stereotypes around me that homeschooled children are either superior (gifted), problematic at the public schools, or special need. It really breaks my heart when my children don't belong to that groups. We have average children to homeschool in the majority of areas, both academic and skills. At least we have not found any best and superior accomplishment they have achieved.
Although we have accepted the real facts about our average children, we sometimes still feel envious indirectly when it comes to the rewarding moment. Well, it might be a feeling of ambition and disappointment that torture us in the “rewarding” moment.
I confess the feeling honestly. It is the selfish side of mine that you might feel disgusting. Is there anyone that has the same feeling and thinking like mine? You should not feel worried and embarrassed. I do have too.
However, when I am getting older, I am getting more mature as well I think. I am not that irritated anymore to know and to accept the fact that I have average children.
Homeschool Average Children
When other parents expose their superior children, I need to calm down myself to homeschool average children. However, I won't feel inferior, because I know that I am called to homeschool average children. Here are some ways I support them.
To accept people as what they are is very important
- It will prevent frustration for both of parents and children. Both of you will have lighter burden to keep striving.
- The feeling of acceptance will rise the feeling of compassion. When you give and show love to children, they will be more motivated.
Keep Enjoy Things
If you are parents of average children, you might be confused what area of expertise that children will be able to enjoy or achieve more. I think most parents try hard to know the passion of their children. Whether you are in the search of passion or in the struggle in it, just go on with what children are doing. Try to get them more and more engaged.
- Attend the lessons regularly
- Ask how they do with the lessons or skills. Be a good listener. Don't just hear them, but have some dialogue.
Don't End The Dream
It is not impossible at all that your children are going to give you surprise. Therefore, keep joining some competition or festivals that might give some chance to achieve. We have joined several competitions in music, sports, and arts where children have the lessons regularly. There is always a hope within their limit of ability. Remember,
[easy-tweet tweet=”There should be something or someone in the middle. People will not be in the top forever. The wheel is rolling.” via=”no” hashtags=”#ihsnet, #parenting” template=”light”]
Keep encouraging their passion. When parents feel motivated, children will feel that. The feeling of being average is also a habit. Children have been used to be in the middle so they forget that they can achieve the top.
Be Patient till The Time Comes
Some children don't have the sense or self motivation to do competition. Do you have children without any sense of competition like I do? I was worried that in the middle of the tight competition in many fields of life, my children don't have any desire to compete with others. I think it is one factor that makes that makes them classified into “average”.
Some children are born naturally with the competition spirit, while others will need longer time to show this. I cannot do anything for this other than waiting and keep motivating. I have to wait until they are ready.
As I said previously, being a winner is sometimes a habit. When children have never been a winner, they won't know how it feels so that they will make less force to strive. That is not a mistake. Even adults might have the same attitude. However, as parents, we need to keep motivating them by enforcing more solid preparation anytime children join competitions.
There are too many either direct and indirect competition in the future and in the public school environment that many average children are not ready to face. Even many children will be not confident to fight all of the time. As a result, they are threatened and got too much pressure. Pears or teachers will underestimate them or even mock them. Parents usually prepare homeschooled children better emotionally and physically so they will have more secure feeling in the competition.
Better Chance to Join Competition
In some public schools, teachers usually choose superior children to join competition represent the classrooms or school. The average children don't have good chance to participate in a competition for the sake of school's or classroom reputation. Meanwhile, the average children will just be cheerleaders. Homeschooling parents can help children to join competition without any “candidate”.
Homeschooled children have more time to practice the skills of children with less burden. The practice sessions can be included into the school timetable to make them more intensive. It is right that some people are born to be superior, but diligent people who practice regularly and consistently will have a better chance. Actually, the average children need diligence in practice.
Do you homeschool average children?
Have you ever been tired of it?
Adelien Tan is a mother of three awesome boys and a wife of a great husband. They are a home education family who live in Surabaya, Indonesia, where home education is still very rare. English is her foreign language, but She tries to use it in blogging.